Pegasus & Magical Bubbles!

Friday, May 27 Y 12:17 AM

To my dearest boy ♥

We have been through so much, I really don't know where to get started. I knew this day would come, ever since you told me last year. I knew this is the path we both choose in our lives, we both choose to be sailors. We both know its never and not going to be easy, yet we stood by each other. I told myself many times that I can do it, what's 6 months if we've been through almost a year. But as the days approach, how I wish I could stop the time. Especially when you called me today, telling me you're going off on the 6th of June. My heart sank immediately. Tears flowed down the moment I hung up the phone. How I wish I didn't pick up the call, how I wish I was dreaming. Although its a fact I have to accept, there's nothing I can do but I really don't wish to face it.

Our 1st year anniversary is coming soon, yet you won't be here anymore. But as I look back into last year, I felt time really passed so quickly. Be it all the happy/sad/angry/irritating moments we had, all these are definitely memories, forever etched in my heart. Seeing all the pictures, gifts and messages we gave each other, indeed, I realized I love you so much. From the day Ahmad sat with me at FC2 to the day I studied with memberoos at concourse, to all the outings and dinners, all this will never be forgotten. Lying to each other just to surprise each other during our birthdays and getting all your friends to plan along with us to prepare everything. I just want to thank you, for all this wonderful times you have given me. And to my dearest brothers : Fameel, Ahmad, Faqih, Hydher, Fariq and so on. Thank all of you for bringing both of us together, for always being here for both of us.

Its the 27th of May 2011, and exactly one year ago, 27 May 2010. It was the first date we had. It was the first time you asked me out, to have dinner with you and we watched "Shrek, Forever After". It was after this day that we fell in love, that you asked me out again and held my hands. It was after this day that made us together.

There's so many emotions running through me now. There's so many things I wish to say to you. Although there is not much time left, I just want to let you know, you have been the lamest boy I have ever met, someone whom doesn't show his emotions out, someone who always listen to me, always seeing me cry every night when you lie on my bed, someone who tells me "Don't lame leh" everyday, someone who never want to get angry with me no matter how horrible I am, someone who always hold me back even when I try so hard to break up, someone who controls whatever I wear and whoever I talk to, someone who have been trying to hard to make me happy, someone who have always been here for me, someone who is closer to me than my family, someone who is willing to be together with such a girl like me, someone whom I love alot, deep in my heart.

For the past 11 months, I see you almost everyday. Thats the reason why I am behaving like that now. Its going to be so difficult isn't it? From seeing each other everyday for 11 months to not seeing each other at all for 6 months. Others may thing its easy, but only you will understand how I feel. I am so dependent on you, I rely so much that I became so comfortable. This is happening so suddenly, I have no time to prepare myself, to tell myself that I can no longer see you everyday. To tell myself, no one is going to walk me home, hold my hands, hug me tightly or give me kisses like you do. No one can ever replace and do the things you did with me everyday.

I am going to be so lonely and sad without you. But right now, all I can do is to ask God to bless you, to guide you through this journey and to see us as one. Whether you are nervous, excited, sad, happy or whatever, I am sure you will enjoy yourself onboard. Where ever you are, do remember baby, you will always be in my heart. No matter how far you go, we are still under the same sky, looking at the same moon.

Remember....